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Ripe purple grapes on a vine symbolize bearing the fruit of the Spirit

The Fruit of the Spirit: Bearing God’s Character in Every Season  

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It was just me, my fury, and God as I lay awake, the rest of my family sleeping peacefully. Someone treated one of my loved ones terribly, and I desperately wanted vengeance. I spent those nighttime hours thinking of creative ways to seek retribution, only to be on the receiving end of the Holy Spirit’s nudge with a mental list of the Fruit of the Spirit: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control (Galatians 5:22-23). In those midnight moments, I recognized the command to conduct my life in accordance with Galatians 5:22-23, even as I wrestled with my desire to behave the opposite.  

As a woman who loves and follows Jesus—I know my actions matter, and those around me carefully watch how I represent Jesus in word and deed, especially when faced with difficult circumstances. The old adage is true: our actions often speak louder than our words.   

God’s Principles Prevail

In the end, God won. I took quiet, respectful action to remove my loved one from the situation without sinking into tit-for-tat behavior. And I was reminded—yet again—that the battle of living a life surrendered to God is rarely fought when life is smooth sailing. It’s easy to be filled with joy and peace and love when there is no conflict, no drama, no unfairness or injustice. It is easy to be patient, gentle, and self-controlled when those around us are acting the same. It is easy to be kind, good, and faithful when our plans are falling together just as we’d hoped and prayed.  

The temptation comes when life goes astray. When faced with unexpected uncertainty, my own anger, frustration, or disappointment, or general culturally acceptable behaviors (gossip, revenge, undermining) by those around me, I’ve learned to be on high alert with respect to my behavioral and verbal responses. In those inevitable times when things get hard, I have counter-cultural choices to make, and I must be intentional. When I react out of strong emotion or get caught up in the moment, especially when others act similarly, I fight an internal battle over how I desire to act and the fruit of the Spirit—usually many of them, simultaneously. 

Practically speaking, I have a few tricks to keeping my behavior God-centered when life throws me curve-balls.   

A bearded man pauses with a cup of coffee as he looks out the window and contemplates reacting with the fruit of the Spirit.

I Pause Before I React  

Both in my words and actions. Whenever possible, I allow 24 hours to pass before responding to something that stirs up difficult emotions or requires a difficult response. (I am referring to situations outside of my marriage and parenting. I do not generally recommend waiting 24 hours to resolve conflict within our most intimate relationships. A short pause to reset, however, can be helpful.)  

Our emotions — while valid — often result in regret if they control our response to a situation. As followers of Jesus, our emotions must not and do not control us. Allowing those strong emotions a chance to  dissipate, especially overnight, can help keep our responses God-centered.      

I Turn to God  

God knows the rawest version of me. I do not have to hide from Him. In fact, I cannot hide from Him. (Psalm 139:13-18) In His presence, I am safe to verbally and emotionally process a situation. I can ask for His discernment and wisdom, and trust that living out the fruit of the Spirit, even though difficult, has immense eternal value and consequences — both for myself and those around me.           

I Practice  

Living as a person living out the Fruit of the Spirit is hard. I fall short of the biblical standard on a decently regular basis. When I fall short, I repent—confessing my sin and asking God to forgive me. And then I ask for a second chance. Sometimes even a third and fourth. And God is good and gracious. He answers those prayers for another shot at living my life in accordance with Galatians 5:22-23.  

Take a few minutes to listen to a short segment of this Abide meditation based on Galatians 5:22-23. Let God speak to your heart about what it looks like to bear God’s character through the fruit of the Spirit. 

With intentionality and these tips, choosing behaviors that align with God’s character becomes the default rather than the exception. And as we choose to live in the fruit of the spirit, we cannot help but influence the world around us. 

For more help living out the fruit of the Spirit, check out the Abide app. Our more than 1500 biblical meditations all exist to help you be more like Jesus. Download the app and start a premium subscription. This will gain you access to our entire library of content. Use this link for 25% off. 

Julie loves encouraging women in their faith journeys through writing and speaking. You can find Julie, a co-author of several devotionals, at The Ruth Experience online and through social media.